Don't open if you don't want a bit of a laugh

 

Sorry for bringing humour to you all


I don't know how they wrote this with a straight face.


This was a real memo sent out by a computer company (IBM) to its employees
in all seriousness. It went to all field engineers about a computer
peripheral problem. The author of this memo was quite genuine. The
engineers rolled on the floor!

Especially note the last couple of sentences.




Re: Replacement of Mouse Balls.

If a mouse fails to operate or should it perform erratically, it may need a
ball replacement. Mouse balls are now available as FRU (Field Replacement
Units).

Because of the delicate nature of this procedure, replacement of mouse
balls should only be attempted by properly trained personnel.

Before proceeding, determine the type of mouse balls by examining the
underside of the mouse. Domestic balls will be larger and harder than
foreign balls

.

Ball removal procedures differ depending upon the manufacturer of the
mouse.

Foreign balls can be replaced using the pop-off method. Domestic balls are
replaced by using the twist-off method.



Mouse balls are not usually static sensitive. However, excessive handling
can result in sudden discharge.

Upon completion of ball replacement, the mouse may be used immediately.



It is recommended that each person have a pair of spare balls for
maintaining optimum customer satisfaction.

Any customer missing his balls should contact the local personnel in charge
of removing and replacing these necessary items.



Please keep in mind that a customer without properly working balls is an
unhappy customer.


Mike

--
National Service (RAF) Ass. Cosford 24 - 27 June Spitfire Fly Past
H.M.S.Impregnable Ass. Sussex 1 - 4 July Visit to Int. Fest of the Sea
RAF Regiment Assoc. Scarborough 2 - 5 Sept. Visit to Eden Camp
H.M.S.Collingwood Assn Trafalgar Dinner. Coventry October 21 - 24

 



They didn't.  It was a gag memo circulated  many, many years ago.
Now many mice don't even have balls.
Tragic.


Gary Woods AKA K2AHC- PGP key on request, or at home.earthlink.net/~garygarlic
Zone 5/6 in upstate New York, 1420' elevation. NY WO G

 

Gary Woods wrote:

Indeed. IBM official documents would never use short words like "spare
mouse balls" when a much longer and more convoluted name could be
foisted on the world.

Replacement Spheroidal Elastomeric Pointing Device Component or RSEPDC
for short. That would be much more plausible IBM speak...

To be authentic the official acronym must be at least as long as the
short word it replaces and totally unpronouncable.

Regards,
Martin Brown

 



I have a theory that the larger a corporation, the more it resembles the
military....
My favorite, veering even farther off-topic, was the Signetics
Semiconductor data sheet for a "write only memory."
Had the usual reliability test data, including "number of pins remaining
vs. number of socket insertions."

Consider yourselves lucky over there:  In (new) York in the northeastern
American colonies, it's 82F with so much humidity you can see and feel the
air.  I'm in "sprint" mode- go out and plant something, come back in and
drink a bunch of water.

Cheers!


Gary Woods AKA K2AHC- PGP key on request, or at home.earthlink.net/~garygarlic
Zone 5/6 in upstate New York, 1420' elevation. NY WO G

 


  I'm in "sprint" mode- go out and plant something, come back in and

Only water?  With the Sun over 'the next door neighbour's shed roof' ?

You let me down :-((

No use inviting you round for sippers

Mike